Archive for the ‘Zombies’ Category

Russian Drug Krokodil Turning People Into Walkers!

Sunday, November 3rd, 2013

Bath-salt zombies are SO two years ago…

A drug called Krokodil has started surfacing here in the states.

Created in Russia, Krokodil has claimed approximately 30,000 lives since the early 2000s when the drug began hitting the street. Krokodil costs about a third the price of heroin, is extremely easy to make and has an extremely intense high that belts you almost immediately.

Big deal. It’s another new way to get high, right? What’s so weird about that?

The horrifying effect the drug has on your precious little living body.

You basically become a ‘walker’. ‘Walker’ as in Walking Dead ‘walker’. As in pieces of that precious little living body aren’t so living and begin decaying…from the inside out!

That’s right. At first Krokodil causes blood vessels to break which causes the skin to turn dark green which then becomes dark and scaly…like a…wait for it….crocodile! After the scaly skin and bursting blood vessels, the drug begins rotting you internally. Currently Krokodil has become Russia’s go-to drug because of it’s low cost and minimal, already-in-your-kitchen ingredients.

Now the stuff has turned up in Arizona and New Mexico along with several recent incidents in Illinois.

Just when you thought bath-salt zombies would be the last word in the whole zombie apocalypse scenario.

[CNN's YouTube]

Zombie Perfume For the ‘Preppers Will Make You Socially Acceptable to the Walking Dead!

Sunday, March 10th, 2013

Fans of The Walking Dead know that if you cover yourself in the leftovers of friends, neighbors and family, zombies will just stroll right on by you…until it begins to rain and things go to hell real fast.

Wouldn’t it be awesome if someone would just come up with a scented…oh wait…it’s happened..

Demeter Fragrances has added two new perfumes to their line-up:

‘Zombie for Him’ and ‘Zombie for Her’.

Now there’s no need to don protective wear and hack away for hours when only a butter knife is available in order to smother yourself with the innards of a hapless stranger…or a not quite zombie-apocalypse-prepped friend.

‘Zombie for Him’ is described thusly:

Think forest floor. Zombie for Him is a combination of dried leaves, mushrooms, mildew, moss and earth. A definite must-have for any Man’s scent collection.

‘Zombie for Her’ is:

A slightly lighter version of the Men’s fragrance with a touch of Dregs from the bottom of the wine barrel for that feminine touch.

Now you can protect anyone in an instant by just spritzing them and blending in socially amongst the walking dead…

Until it suddenly rains again.


Store Opens – Caters to Surviving the Apocalypse!

Wednesday, December 12th, 2012

Everyone say thank you to those crazy Mayans. Not only did they give us reason to create some truly spectacular parties where hangovers and regret would never even have a chance to hit us but those forward-thinking ancient-folk are also helping build small businesses like this one in Fayetteville, New York.

‘Survival: Adventure to Apocalypse’ is a real store catering to everyone’s favorite Mayan holiday…Armageddon. Owner and lady with a name that should heave her into a television-action series soon, Calypso Ford has stocked her new business venture with everything from boots for your pets to waterproof notepads as the impending, and probably disappointing, end of the world draws to its conclusion.

Ford’s store won’t carry guns or ammunition but it will carry items that would help people during something like a natural disaster. Survival: Adventure to Apocalypse will be open 7 days a week leading up the big day.

We’re going to be the first in line on the 22nd for the big half-off sale.

[CNYCentral News]

Pennsylvania Reports Its First Possible Bath-Salt Zombie Attack!

Monday, September 17th, 2012

Remember when eating bath-salts, slipping into a rabid zombie-like state, getting naked and chewing the faces off innocent pedestrians was kinda trendy and cool?

Apparently 20 year-old Richard Cimino Jr of Doylestown, Pennsylvania hasn’t been paying attention to the bath-salt fount of information that this blog is about such things.

State police responded to a call the other night from two women who reported an assault…an assault by?

We can hear all of you in a weird unison of unspoken nodding…’bath-salt zombie’.

According to early reports, Cimino pulled his car up behind a home early in the morning, stripped to his underwear and tried to break into the home. The resident at that home startled Cimino who fled to another home not far away and proceeded to break in to the second home. No one was home.

Cimino proceeded up to the second floor of the home and, like the erratic behavior exhibited by most of the ‘Bath-Salt Zombies’ we’ve seen so far, parkoured himself from the second-story window severely injuring his arms and legs when he slammed into the ground.

True to ‘Bath-Salt Zombie’ lore (which stretches back in time to the end of January of this year) Cimino got up and walked away while bleeding profusely.

Cimino then approached two women, who once again helped this whole incident slide into the typical ‘Bath-Salt Zombie’ profile when he jumped one of them and, “screaming like a wild animal”, began gnawing on the skull of one of the poor women.

Both women managed to escape Cimino, who police later found covered in blood acting delusional and confrontational.

After lunging at a state trooper and punching a medical technician, Cimino was tasered and taken to Geisinger Community Medical Center in Scranton.

Cimino is charged with two counts each of aggravated assault, criminal mischief, indecent exposure, three counts of burglary and several other charges.

At this time tests regarding what Cimino may have been hopped up on are still pending.

Anyone want to take a stab at what he may have been on? Anyone?


WeirdThings Tracking Zombie/Cannibal Activity World-Wide

Wednesday, July 4th, 2012

Grab your shovels, shotguns and a copy of Zombieland, kids…we’re just gettin’ started.

Here’s your cannibal/zombie update for the July 4th holiday:

United States - In Georgia, Karl Laventure consumes everyone’s favorite new synthetic brain-melter, bath salts. In a somewhat trendy move, he strips naked and begins running around and shouting. Only this time it’s not on a causeway…it’s a golf course. Laventure was running across a golf course, naked, twirling a golf club above his head and shouting to officers who attempted to stop him, “I’ma eat you. I’ll eat you! I don’t want to eat you but I will!” Laventure shrugged off pepper spray blasts and five tasers before the sixth taser brought him under control. Go acquaint yourself with just one taser to fully comprehend what that feels like. Seriously…SIX TASERS!

China - Racing to the top of the news chain, the Shanghai Daily blasts the front page with a story of a bus driver who drove his bus into an intersection and ended up blocking a woman’s vehicle. The bus driver jumps out of his bus and begins playing ‘Whack-a-Mole’ on her windshield with his fists. Terrified, the woman flees her car. Within seconds the bus driver reaches her, tosses her to the ground and begins chewing on her face. Several plastic surgeries will be needed to restore her face to ‘normal’.

Russia - Body parts begin turning up in a basement and floating down the Moscow river that lead authorities to Nikolai Shadrin. Police arrive at Shadrin’s apartment to find him calmly eating stew…a stew which consists of pieces of his friend, Ilya Yegorov. Shadrin is convicted when his fingerprints show up all over the small garden shovel he used to portion out Yegorov. Shadrin nails his conviction shut when he confesses he also dined on Yegorov’s liver like a certain literary cannibal we all know (except that Shadrin seems like the type to drink his chianti from a box).

It’s happening, kids. Play time and funny podcast scenarios are over. We’re suggesting taking a little prep time now to save yourself some heartache later because you forgot to snag some ammo for your boomstick and find that the only shovel-like object you own is a rubber spatula.

Trust WeirdThings to keep you informed on any more zombie-like activity. Have a safe holiday and watch your face.

You’re welcome.

Bath-Salt Zombie Activity in New York!

Wednesday, June 27th, 2012

We’re not out of the woods yet, kids.

‘Bath Salt Zombie’ activity is now being reported in central New York!

Police officers were called to a bar where a visibly disturbed woman lunged at one officer’s face while screaming that she wanted to “kill someone and eat them!”

This lovely lady won a free ride in a well-cushioned van to the local hospital for mental evaluation.

Just a little while later in a not-so-zombie-like, but still bath-salt fueled, incident, 20 year-old Aubrey Vallis had ripped a door off its hinges and was busy punching a car in a driveway when police busted him for criminal mischief.

Anyone else find themselves a little nervous around the bath section of your local drugstore lately?

[Time Herald Record Online]

Zombie Attacks Continue!

Friday, June 8th, 2012

Every time we laugh about a zombie apocalypse another incident bites our lips right off our smiles and reminds us that we should probably stop laughing and start grabbing shovels.

This time around what began as a domestic disturbance call from neighbors turned into something that’s getting a little too familiar right now.

The ‘zombie’ in this case is 43-year-old Carl Jacquneaux. Todd Credeur, the victim who knew Jacquneaux, was outside working in his yard when we was attacked by Jacquneaux. Credeur stated that he was shocked when Jacquneaux bit him on the face. Credeur was able to spray wasp pray on Jacquneaux’s eyes and escape the attack.

Carl Jacquneaux wasn’t quite finished. He jumped into his car and headed to another friend’s where he that friend at knife-point and snagged a handgun.

That was when the law caught up with him.

While no one’s really sure what set Jacquneaux on his zombie-like attack on Credeur, one of the victim’s friends stated that he was, in fact, under the influence of something at the time.

Anyone want to venture to take you know, a big stab in the dark about what the victim’s friend claims he might’ve been taking?


Bath salts.

[KATC News]

Authorities Detain Man Claiming to be Resurrected Folk Singer as Fans Flock

Tuesday, February 7th, 2012
Musician impersonator due in court - Times LIVE.jpg

He spent his time with zombies.

That’s the excuse for a man claiming to be Zulu folk singer Mgqumeni, who died and was buried in 2009 on why he hasn’t be around. The would-be Mgqumeni says he’d spent the intervening years amongst the undead before freeing himself and returning to the world of the living.

The man claiming to be the resurrected artist, told The Times newspaper: “I have been suffering a lot at the place where I was kept with zombies. It was hell there and I am so grateful that I was able to free myself and return to my family and you, my supporters.”

The man has now been brought to a local court and authorities could exhume Mgqumeni’s remains to test them against his alleged incarnate. They are going to test his DNA against Mgqumeni’s and have warned him that he will be charged with fraud should they not match up.

Upon hearing of his return, many of the singers fans have flocked to see their possibly resurrected idol. Above is a picture of Mgquemi now after surviving the afterlife and below is a picture before.


Mgqumeni zombies.jpg

Satan, Santa, and Zombies: Search Patterns Revealed

Monday, December 19th, 2011

The University of Oxford’s Internet Institute has analyzed Google search patterns and discovered that there are places in the United States where there are more people searching for zombies and satan than for Santa Claus.

“a few pockets including just outside the San Francisco Bay and Seattle and the cities Houston, Dallas and Austin in Texas have a lot of zombie angst. Hmmm…it might be the only things these places are in agreement on. But one of the more interesting clusters runs from Tampa to Orlando Florida….home of Disney World. Sort of makes sense in a way. Also of interest is a thin band of zombies stretched out along the Eastern seaboard, west of most of the major metropolitan areas.”

Check out the Satan cluster around Tampa Bay; I am going to have to start watching my neighbors a little more closely. You can download the data here and find your own patterns.

[Floating Sheep via Gizmodo]

Zombie Extras Injured On Resident Evil Set Horrify Paramedics

Wednesday, October 12th, 2011

While filming the fifth installment of the Resident Evil franchise 16 zombie extras fell from a platform. Emergency responders, who were unaware of the costumes, were taken aback when brought to the pile of mangled faces, discolored skin and peeling flesh.

Paramedics responded to the call from Cinespace Film Studios around 8 a.m. to find what appeared — thanks to Hollywood special effects makeup — to be people who had suffered some untold catastrophe.

“I could see the look on the first paramedic, saying ‘Oh my God,’” Toronto emergency medical services Commander David Ralph said with a laugh.

Toronto Police Sgt. Andrew Gibson said responders quickly figured out which zombies were injured and which were just in character. “It did kind of catch us off guard when we walked in,” he said.

Thankfully, none of the injuries were life threatening and all of the zombies will live on to stagger another day.

[Fox News]

Neuroscientists Provide First Look At The Zombie Brain

Monday, August 15th, 2011

As far as we know,  nobody has ever harvested the undead brain of a zombie to properly examine it, and get a better idea of what causes a person to turn into a walking flesh-eating virus. Furtunately, there are neuroscientists working on a theoretical model of not only the zombie brain, but an actual medical diagnosis of the zombie condition.

Bradley Voytek, PhD, and Timothy Verstynen, PhD, met in graduate school, and when they realized they had a shared interest in the undead, they began to apply their knowledge of brain chemistry and disorders to the creation of a zombie brain model. Neurology Today recently interviewed the duo about  their findings.

My graduate advisor had always said how people with cerebellar ataxia had a “zombie walk”… So that was the next logical link-up to known diseases. We just kept going with that kind of “forensic neuroscience” logic and after a while, we identified several “symptoms” that we could link to known circuits.

The image above shows an MRI model of the key areas of the brain that are expected to become atrophied or destroyed by the zombification, an affliction the two doctors have diagnosed as Consciousness Deficit Hypoactivity Disorder. Dr Verstynen provides a detailed description of CDHD:
Zombies suffer from a global impairment of several systems. First, they suffer from impulsive-reactive aggression disorder linked to a loss of the orbitofrontal control signals to the amygdala. Thus, they have a hyper-amygdala disorder… We also found they suffer from ataxic movements due to a loss of the cerebellum. Additionally, they have bilateral hippocampal damage, which explains the lack of long-term memory consolidation. Obviously, the whole arcuate language circuit is destroyed in the zombies, which explains their aphasias. In some cases, Broca’s circuit may be intact enough to allow limited communication abilities, such as moaning, but assuredly, the posterior language areas are all destroyed leading them to lack verbal comprehension. Their reduced pain response is due to damage to the secondary somatosensory cortex, although this may also be mediated by damage to ascending spinal pathways. They also have attentional locking problems, such as Balint’s syndrome, due to bilateral degeneration of the posterior parietal cortices, which also affects their coordination abilities… Dysfunction of the ventral striatal reward pathways leads to addictive behaviors, particularly a “flesh addiction.” Finally, they suffer from a completely lack of meta-consciousness thanks to an ablation of the claustrum.”
Since CDHD destroys so much of a subjects brain, there will not likely be any cure for the disorder.  The best treatment is still destroying whats left of the brain to put them out of their misery.

Convert Your Baby Carriage Into A Mobile Arsenal & Other Zombie Defense Gun Tips

Monday, August 1st, 2011

The prevailing wisdom in modern zombie fiction suggests that the use of guns, while more effective than other weapons, may not always be the best decision,  since there is a greater chance that the noise will draw the attention of more undead, or that you will injure yourself or a fellow survivor.

That said,  when the shambling hoards begin to infest our streets, we will all invariably be in a position where we will need to shoot our way out to survive. Luckily, for those among us who don’t regularly use firearms, the folks at Outdoor Life attended the 4th annual Outbreak Omega Zombie Shootout in Minnesota last month, and compiled a list of practical advice for that day when you’re staring down the ironsights at a group of your recently turned friends and family.

-You’re going to want at least a rifle, shotgun and a pistol. To carry all of these guns you’re going to have to get creative, like converting a baby stroller into a gun carriage.

-If you want to live you’re going to have to shoot quickly. Think light-kicking semi-autos.

-Join your fellow zombie killers to increase your odds of survival. Communication is key here. Designate which targets you’re going to engage and which ones your partner is going to engage.

-If you’re shooting with a scope, leave it on low power in case you’re ambushed at close range. You can always crank it up for longer shots.

-An AR is the perfect zombie gun:
1) Extremely versatile and easy to modify
2) High ammo capacity
3) Easy to shoot
4) Light recoil
5) Durable

-Save your empties

-When the flesh eaters close in and all hope seems lost, go to your ace in the hole, the Black and Decker Tactical Chainsaw. Make sure you include the splash plate to keep the zombie fluids from getting into your eyes nose or mouth.

A tactical chainsaw bayonet with splash guard? I think I just found my next rainy-day workshop project.

[Outdoor Life]

Are Wasps The Origin Of The Zombie Outbreak?

Wednesday, July 27th, 2011

Chris Tisdale is the WeirdThings beat writer covering the latest updates about the coming zombie apocalypse.

Some people believe that the coming zombie apocalypse will result from a mutation or manipulation of something that already occurs in nature, typically a virus or other disease, but I say we might not need to look further than the insect world.  Take the wasp species Dinocampus coccinellae, for example. Like most parasitic creatures, this insect uses a host organism -in this case, a ladybug- as a living incubator for its eggs. When the larvae are hatched, however, something interesting happens. According to HowStuffWorks:

Normally, the host organism mercifully dies at this point, but DC’s ladybug is not so lucky. Not only does it live, but a little behavior modification forces it to hang around and “guard” its parasite-baby as it grows into adulthood beneath its protective bulk. Scientists believe that secretions left by the larva when it bursts out might play a role in reprograming the host.

Amazingly, many ladybugs actually survive this process, and resume “normal behavior” when the wasps reach maturity and the zombification wears off.

Not only does this study show that zombies do exist in nature, it shows something can survive it. Might come in handy one day.


British City Forced To Admit It Is Unprepared For A Zombie Apocalypse

Friday, June 10th, 2011

The Leicester City Council is “not ready” for a zombie attack and a concerned citizen forced them to admit it using the Freedom of Information Act. The CDC recently released one here in the U.S., but it could use some work.

“A worried member of the public has forced Leicester City Council to admit it is unprepared for a zombie invasion.

The authority received a Freedom of Information request which said provisions to deal with an attack, often seen in horror films, were poor.

The “concerned citizen” said the possibility of such an event was one that councils should be aware of.

Zombie letter in full

Dear Leicester City Council,

Can you please let us know what provisions you have in place in the event of a zombie invasion? Having watched several films it is clear that preparation for such an event is poor and one that councils throughout the kingdom must prepare for.

Please provide any information you may have.

Yours faithfully,

Concerned Citizen”

[BBC via Geekologie]

Spacious, Zombie-Proof House Built For Your Safety

Wednesday, June 1st, 2011

Skitched 20110601 154825

It’s called the Safe House. You get in via a retractible concrete drawbridge. All guests must be buzzed in from a safety zone before entering the home itself. It is the perfect humble abode for the young family terrified of being torn apart by zombies.

Built between 2005 and 2009, the house features Rubik’s Cube-type movable parts and folds in on itself completely at the end of the day to seal against outside threats.

“Every day the house acts in a similar way — it wakes up every morning to close up after dusk,” says architect Robert Konieczny of KWK Promes.

Wait? It’s on the outskirts of Poland? Even when it comes to a zombie holocaust you can’t violate the three rules of real estate: location, location, location.

[Fox News]

CDC Publishes Zombie Outbreak Plan

Wednesday, May 18th, 2011

The CDC has published a plan in case of a zombie outbreak. I am disappointed that their emergency kit does NOT include any weapons at all. That does not sound like a valid plan to me and I will definitely be upgrading the proposed kit with some additional items.

“If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (including isolation and quarantine). It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated.”

[CDC via Geekologie]