Archive for the ‘Drunk’ Category

Budweiser Cup Allows Drunken, Awkward Friend Requests via ‘Clinking’

Friday, May 3rd, 2013

Someone at Budweiser had apparently just read about Virgin America’s in-cabin, passenger-to-passenger texting service, knocked back a couple bottles and decided that the giant beer-hive should also get in on the act of making social interaction among drunken stalkers and their prey even more uncomfortable.

Using a ‘Buddy Cup’, you scan the cup with your phone, link your Facebook profile to the chip embedded in the bottom of the cup and then, magically, every time you clink cups with someone else who’s gone through the process, you become ‘friends’ on everyone’s favorite social hive.

Buddy Cup! Because there’s nothing like becoming friends with all the people involved in a lot of bad decision-making from the night before.

[BudBrasilOficial YouTube]

Man Dies Imitating Bigfoot!

Tuesday, August 28th, 2012

“How’d your uncle die?”

“He was dressed like a sad, ghetto version of bigfoot, walked into traffic and got nailed by two oncoming cars.”

True story.

44-year-old Randy Lee Tenley of Montana was struck dead when he was hit by two oncoming vehicles as he attempted to cross several lanes of traffic dressed like more like a topiary at a bankrupt garden attraction than Bigfoot in hopes he’d stir up some sightings of the infamously mysterious legend.

Police are continuing their investigation to see if alcohol played a role in the incident.

We’re going to go with, “Yes. There was a LOT of alcohol that a role in the incident.”

What kind of epitaph would you write for that?

The Alien Who Was Confused For A Drunk Driver

Wednesday, May 11th, 2011

Skitched 20110511 131911

A loud bang shatters the calm of a California morning.

Outside, indulging in her ritual cup of coffee and a cigarette, a local mother simply assumes that a neighbor tied one on a little too tight last night. An evening at the bar turned into a morning on the road and ended with a crash into the community’s gate.

No big deal.

Then, it came from around the house. At first, she assumed by the hurried pace it must have been a thief. A tall, skinny, silver thief. Silver?

It came around the house, still trying to hide. My mother said the figure’s height reached the bottom of the start of the roof, which is around or more than 7ft in height.

She said it was very slender like a pole and silver.

The oddity then ran away from the woman and toward a tree where it disappeared from view.

Questions: was any wreckage found to have caused the loud bang? Did anyone else see the creature? Can we totally rule out that the alien wasn’t, in fact, drunk driving?

[UFO Casebook]