Archive for the ‘Apocalypse’ Category

Giant Snake Opens Doors – Steps Into Your Nightmares!

Monday, June 24th, 2013

Watch as this door opens up and something spills straight out of this closet and into your nightmares.

This is Julius and yes…this thing DID learn to open even round doorknobs. So you’re really not safe anywhere.

Julius passed away in 2012 from an infection that her vet could not diagnose. While we’re saddened about that…we’re glad that Julius didn’t get the chance to visit Florida and teach the rampant pythons here this trick.

That would’ve finally dumped the Sunshine State into the hellmouth it currently sits on.


Huge Meteor Burns Out Over Russia – Plays Out Like a JJ Abrams Movie!

Friday, February 15th, 2013

Like found footage from an unannounced JJ Abrams flick, video is slamming YouTube from all over Russia about a large meteor that hit the atmosphere.

Details are still coming in about the event and we’ll have a fuller piece about it later.

For now? Grab some popcorn and enjoy a teaser for what the end of the world could look like.

The most amazing video that hit the internet almost immediately is from a driver’s dash-cam as the event takes place (for all of you who have NOT seen videos showing why Russian drivers need dash-cams? You’re depriving yourself)!

Next up? The sound of the sonic boom reaching the street. There have been reports of multiple injuries from exploding glass and falling objects…it’s like an ‘air-quake’!

And as people begin turning their cameras to the sky, the whole JJ Abrams-esque thing begins to manifest as everyone stands around staring at this terrifyingly strange and probably overwhelming event.

We’ll post more later as Russia calms the hell down.

Store Opens – Caters to Surviving the Apocalypse!

Wednesday, December 12th, 2012

Everyone say thank you to those crazy Mayans. Not only did they give us reason to create some truly spectacular parties where hangovers and regret would never even have a chance to hit us but those forward-thinking ancient-folk are also helping build small businesses like this one in Fayetteville, New York.

‘Survival: Adventure to Apocalypse’ is a real store catering to everyone’s favorite Mayan holiday…Armageddon. Owner and lady with a name that should heave her into a television-action series soon, Calypso Ford has stocked her new business venture with everything from boots for your pets to waterproof notepads as the impending, and probably disappointing, end of the world draws to its conclusion.

Ford’s store won’t carry guns or ammunition but it will carry items that would help people during something like a natural disaster. Survival: Adventure to Apocalypse will be open 7 days a week leading up the big day.

We’re going to be the first in line on the 22nd for the big half-off sale.

[CNYCentral News]

Possible Chinese Rage Virus? Man Chews Other Man’s Arm Over Subway Seat!

Monday, October 15th, 2012

Here in the states, Bath-Salt Zombie activity has gone into a lull as everyone following the gruesome trend keeps a wary eye out for the next crazy-looking person who reeks of ‘Blossoming Garden Jasmine’ and keeps eyeballing your body like a slab of ribs.

Meanwhile, over in China, a strange attack has caused hopeful zombie apocalypse fans to perk up with curious dog head-tilt.

During a subway ride, a 67 year-old retiree asked a young man refused to give up the seat to his elder? The 28 year-old whipper-snapper suddenly found himself tackled by the older man. Not only was he being attacked, he was being chewed on! The elder man was literally taking chunks of flesh out of the younger man’s arm and the blood was flowing.

In behavior that resembled a bunch of cornered mice, witnesses scattered to corners of the subway car then someone hit the record button on their phone and caught the whole attack on video for the world to see. YouTube has taken down the video based on their policies but you can still find it online. We’re warning you. It’s not for the squeamish when you do find it.

According to the news covering the story, both men were apprehended, taken to the police station and let go.

Yup. Let go.

Not only that but they both apologized for their behavior and agreed to pay their own medical bills.

Neither of them will be charged with anything.

Anyone else seeing into the near-future now that this precedent’s been set? Us too.


Apocalyptic Chic: ‘Ghost Cities’

Wednesday, July 4th, 2012

Like some kind of massive, uber-budgeted, city-wide set of a Ridley Scott film that takes place after the fall of mankind, several cities built by China are almost completely devoid of life.

What’s even stranger is that these massive cities continue to be built even though hardly a single living thing is taking up residence in them.

Recently an entire Chinese-built city in Africa popped up on everyone’s radar because of its sheer size. Named Nova Cidade de Kilamba, this massive city covers 12,335 acres, contains 750 eight-story apartment buildings, 12 schools, more than 100 retail units, is designed to hold an estimated 500,000 people and was built in less than three years for a hefty 3.5 billion dollars.

At the current build rate as many as 20 of these ‘ghost cities’ are being constructed every year with currently as many as 64 million vacant homes left empty.

These cities aren’t being built in people-friendly locations either…one of them is actually built in the middle of a Mongolian desert.


Florida Zombie-Like Attacks Continue!

Friday, June 22nd, 2012

A decade from now when society looks back on what brought about the zombie apocalypse, Florida will probably be referred to as ground zero.

Once again, this time in Manatee County, Florida, law enforcement had to resort to using multiple tasers to subdue 26 year-old Charles Baker. Did you catch that part where we said “multiple tasers”? It took six bullets at close range to stop the “Causeway Cannibal” during the now infamous incident in Miami involving a bathsalt-induced face-chewing attacker of a homeless man.

Baker went to visit his kids who were staying with their grandparents.

Upon entering the house, Baker proceeded to throw furniture, scream and then, like other recent zombies, began removing his clothes.

Jeffrey Blake, owner of the house made an attempt to restrain Baker. Baker bit into Blake’s biceps.

Authorities believe Baker was under the influence of some kind of drug.

Anyone care to yell out what that might be? Anyone?

We’re hedging bath salts….

You probably are too.


Zombie Apocalypse Begins in Miami?

Tuesday, May 29th, 2012

UPDATE: It’s been determined that the ‘Causeway Cannibal’ was not on any synthetic drugs or bath salts. He was high on marijuana.

Whether we’re ready for it or not, it seems like either someone could no longer contain the T-Virus or simply that the zombie apocalypse may actually have begun….in Miami.

During a gorgeous Sunday afternoon in South Florida, a patrolling road ranger rolled up on something that can only be described as ghoulish.

Two men seemed to be scuffling on the MacArthur Causeway. What he reportedly witnessed is the kind of scene that typically begins a zombie film or opens an episode of The Walking Dead.

One of the men was naked. That same naked man was also chewing the flesh from the face from the other man.

The officer, which has not been identified as of this posting, repeatedly asked the assailant to cease his attack to no avail. Witnesses report at least a half dozen shots were fired by the officer before the attacker stopped his assault.

At the time of this posting the attack is still being investigated. The Miami Herald, which had its own surveillance cameras on a nearby parking garage has submitted the footage to the police. The victim is currently in critical condition.

While most of the news stories coming out about the incident point toward some kind of drug trip gone ugly, putting together a couple shovels, a shotgun and getting in some jogging might not be such bad idea either.

You know…just in case.

[The Miami Herald]

Is This the Sound of the Earth Dying?

Tuesday, January 17th, 2012

Strange sounds are happening all over the world. One part airplane flyover, two parts Inception BAHHH! with a dash of wind wooosh for good measure. The clip above is from Budapest, Hungary last week. There are clips from all over the world in the io9 link below.

Some are even calling it the end of the world. The sound of the seventh seal breaking and hell coming to infest Earth.

On the other hand, the crack team at Ask Reddit seems to believe that it’s all hogwash. But if that’s the case, is it coordinated? Are they being produced to spread panic? Plug an upcoming movie?

If it is a farce, it’s a pretty clever one. All you have to do is take footage of the air and layer in the audio. If you really want to sell it, get some people looking up in the air. Or, if you insist on pulling out all the stops, have someone mention there is a strange sounds outside. For “video proof” it’s about as low tech as you get.


“2012 Apocalypse Prophecy is Nonsense” Says Guy Who Prophecized Apocalypse in 2011

Wednesday, December 28th, 2011

Harold Camping, who famously predicted the rapture twice in 2011, has retired from his role as host on the Christian station Family Radio Network and from doomsday predictions in general. An aide says Camping will make no proclamations for the coming year.

And as for those persistent theories that the Mayan calendar heralds the end of days in 2012. You know, the ones that threaten to turn all of our New Year’s Resolutions into Bucket List items?


One thing is guaranteed, however: Camping will not be jumping on the bandwagon with people who believe the world will end on Dec. 21, 2012 — the date that supposedly marks the end of the Mayan calendar cycle. “Mr. Camping does not believe the Mayan calendar holds any significance at all,” Espinoza said in an email.

I can’t explain it, but I think this makes the 2012 prophecy slightly more credible.

[Life’s Little Mysteries]

Apocalypse Bunker – “You Had Me At Missile Base!”

Thursday, April 14th, 2011

Something bad is coming (probably). Whether it is plague, zombies, alien invasion, doomsday comets, magnetic pole shifts, or just the general end of the world, and Larry Hall has the perfect opportunity ready for those who want to be prepared. He shelled out $250,000 for a decommissioned Atlas F Missile Base in Kansas and is now selling condos starting at $900,000. Hey, that price includes five years worth of food too. You better hurry up, three of the seven floors are already taken.

“I thought, wow, I can transform it into an ultrasafe, energy-efficient fortress,” Hall says. Then he figured that other people might also sleep better 200 feet underground within epoxy-hardened concrete walls. And with a custom retrofit featuring GE Monogram stainless-steel appliances and Kohler fixtures, they could also eat (and flush) in style. So Hall announced a “condo suite package”—starting at $900,000—that includes a five-year food supply (think hydroponics and aquaculture) and “simulated view windows” with light levels calibrated to the time of day to keep you from going crazy.


2012 Russian Doomsday Capsule

Monday, February 14th, 2011

A Russian military engineer, Evgeny Ubiyko, is building an $80,000 Doomsday Capsule designed to survive the 2012 apocalypse, as understood from folklore, television and movies. Ubiyko is building his capsule on an abandoned battery farm just outside Moscow.

“The capsule is hermetic, it’s got four layers of insulation. It can float, roll down hills, and land upside down – without being damaged,” Evgeny explains.

“It cannot be destroyed by tremors, or lava, or magnetic storms. This is where the shower will be, and the air purification systems. It can house up to four people for 40 days and costs $80,000.”

I want to reiterate this last point: the inventor claims that this capsule is impervious to LAVA.  That is something that I would like to see in action. Hey, fun fact – if the world doesn’t actually end, Evgeny says the capsules can be used as saunas or industrial fridges.  He strongly recommends that the government order several thousand immediately.


Ghostly Horseman Spotted At Egyptian Protests

Tuesday, February 8th, 2011

The lesser known 5th horseman of the apocalypse is called Lens Flare and he rides a glowing horse.


Mapping The Mass Deaths

Thursday, January 6th, 2011

Lately, it is hard keeping track of all the animal die-offs. Thankfully somebody has put together this handy map so that we all can play along at home.

New Crater Suggests Our Looming Death From Above Could Be Larger, Harder

Monday, July 26th, 2010

_Fresh_ Crater Found in Egypt; Changes Impact Risk?.jpg

A research team in Egypt has identified a “fresh” crater thought to be formed by a crashed iron meteor, could mean incoming space rocks would hit earth in bigger chunks than we once suspected.

The Italian-Egyptian team that found the crater in pictures recently visited and studied the 147-foot-wide (45-meter-wide), 52-foot-deep (16-meter-deep) hole. The team also collected thousands of pieces of the space rock that littered the surrounding desert.

Current impact models state that iron meteors around this size and mass should break into smaller chunks before impact. (Related: “Comet ‘Shower’ Killed Ice Age Mammals?”)

Instead, the existence of the newfound crater implies that up to 35 percent of these iron giants may actually survive whole—and thus have greater destructive power.

Hold on to your butts.

[Nat Geo]

Good Morning Mr. Sun! New Solar Storms Could Destroy Our Economy

Monday, June 7th, 2010

The sun has awoken from his slumber and you will feel his wrath upon your global positioning satellites and financial services.

Richard Fisher, head of NASA’s Heliophysics Division, explains what it’s all about:

“The sun is waking up from a deep slumber, and in the next few years we expect to see much higher levels of solar activity. At the same time, our technological society has developed an unprecedented sensitivity to solar storms. The intersection of these two issues is what we’re getting together to discuss.”

The National Academy of Sciences framed the problem two years ago in a landmark report entitled “Severe Space Weather Events—Societal and Economic Impacts.” It noted how people of the 21st-century rely on high-tech systems for the basics of daily life. Smart power grids, GPS navigation, air travel, financial services and emergency radio communications can all be knocked out by intense solar activity. A century-class solar storm, the Academy warned, could cause twenty times more economic damage than Hurricane Katrina.

A lot of this could be avoided with preparation by those who run the satellites. So we have that going for us.


Is A Massive Star About To Collapse, Fry Us All?

Thursday, June 3rd, 2010


Phil Plait dissects a recent rumor about the Betelgeuse star. The short version of the rumor? The star is going to go all supernova in weeks or months (not years or hundreds of years) and the brightness could affect crops and cause streaming panic in the streets.

Phil’s rebuttal? Not so much.

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t start stockpiling canned goods and telling your friends the sky is falling just so in two months when you pal’s newly orphaned children are huddled in your bunker to get away from the blood-thirsty mobs left by a post-apocalyptic society you can say… “I told your pa this was coming, (wistful glance to a bare wall) wish he would’ve listened.”

[Bad Astronomy]