Archive for the ‘College’ Category

Abominable Snowman Goes To College: Yeti Institute Coming To Russian University

Thursday, March 24th, 2011

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Ever wondered if there was a degree ever more impractical than your double major of philosophy and sociology? We encourage you to submit your application to Kemerovo State University where you can become culturally enriched and educated at their recently announced Yeti Institute.

The facility comes after a recent run of Abominable Snowman sightings in the Siberian mountains. It will be headed up by Igor Burtsev who believes the current creatures being spotted are surviving Neanderthals.

He explains:

‘We spoke to local residents’, said Dr Igor Burtsev, who conducted an expedition last summer and will head the new institute at Kemerovo State University. ‘They told us Yetis were stealing their animals.’

The academic claims around 30 Yetis live in a remote region of Mount Shoria in in southern Siberia.

He strongly denies accusations that the ’sightings’ are a bizarre ruse to attract tourists to the far-flung region.

Reports say the two-legged creatures are heavy-set, more around 7ft tall and resemble bears.

‘Their bodies were covered in red and black fur, and they could climb trees,’ said one account.

We immediately have two questions. Is there anything more awesome than this? Will they accept transfer credits from community college?

[Daily Mail via Cryptomundo]

Penn State Using Acoustic Scientists To Optimize Drunken Screaming For Their Benefit

Tuesday, May 11th, 2010

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College football is a loud sport and in a game as verbally-dependent as football if a visiting team can’t relay their plays effectively or make last minute adjustments, it can be huge advantage for a home team. So it is no surprise that Penn State has not only done scientific research to determine the veracity, direction and variability of you and your hammered dorm friends screaming obscenities at the opposing quarterback and his dumb face… they plan to make it louder.

Next season, the university’s athletic department will put into play a new strategy to make its field even louder thanks to a team of acoustic scientists. The goal is to send a deafening wall of sound at the opposing team’s offensive line.

“We’re not going to let visiting teams get comfortable, and if you can’t get comfortable, you’re probably not going to perform as well,” said Guido D’Elia, director for communications and branding for Penn State football.

Working with D’Elia in 2007-08, Penn State graduate student Andrew Barnard recorded crowd noise during three home games. Using 11 sound meters strategically placed around the field, he compared volume levels when each team had the ball.

When the Penn State’s Nittany Lions were on the offense the noise levels inside 107,282-seat Beaver Stadium reached 75 decibels on the field. That’s about as loud as a car radio playing at a reasonable volume.

But the noise skyrocketed to 110 decibels — 50 times as loud — when visiting teams were on offense, drowning out the calls of the quarterback and making last-minute adjustments at the line of scrimmage very difficult.

We are guessing the exact strategy for amplifying the sound in the direction of the quarterback and offensive line is something they are going to keep close to the vest. However, if an Ohio State left guard passes out on the field whilst blood spills from his ears, you’ll know it’s working.

[Inside Science from Improbable Research]