Archive for August, 2013

Being Buried in a Bacon Coffin is a Thing Now!

Sunday, August 25th, 2013

How much do you love bacon? Enough to be eternally wrapped inside of a bacon coffin that smells like bacon?

Well if you want to really tweak friends and family out when you leave or just make people shake their heads at you one last time you can purchase a coffin with a bacon paint job. The crew over at the ‘Everything Should Taste Like Bacon’ blog have created just that and you can snag one from their site for about $3000.

“This genuine bacon casket is made of 18 Gauge Gasketed Steel with Premium Bacon Exterior/Interior, and includes a Memorial and Record Tube, Adjustable Bed and Mattress and Stationary and Swingbar handles. It also includes a bacon air freshener for when you get that buried-underground, not-so-fresh feeling. “

You might want to toss in a little extra for multiple air fresheners.

[Everything Should Taste Like Bacon]

Surgical Procedure To Give You a Perma-Smile – Just Like Batman’s Nemesis

Sunday, August 25th, 2013

For anyone cosplaying the Joker at DragonCon, you can take it to a whole new level and show just how dedicated you are.

You can now head over to Korea, the world’s WalMart of plastic surgery, and get that frowny, upside-down face surgically fixed into a smiling, confident, sun-shiny one.

Known as a Smile Lipt, this surgery pulls your mouth corners up into a smile instead of down like the old curmudgeon you are inside. All you need to do is make an appointment and shell out about $2000.

What’s unsettling about the surgery isn’t the procedure or that it’s sad that a pretend smile in Korea will knock you back two grand. What’s unsettling is the number of young Koreans getting the procedure done so they’re found more attractive for prospective mates.

And if you have a perma-frown? You might want to think twice about having this because at the end of the video the narrator lets you know about the possible side effects which includes the smile being over-corrected…just like a pasty, green-haired villain we all know and love.

In the last couple of weeks this surgery has been getting some attention from the media but the procedure actually dates back several decades so this isn’t something new…it’s just popped in the mainstream’s feed.

One thing’s for certain though…you’re going to have to get the word ‘mouthcorners’ surgically removed from your brain after watching this video.

[ABC News Univision]

You can watch one of their satisfied clients leave their surgery below:

Jump! Jump! Grasshopper Rocket Stretches Its Legs in Latest Test

Saturday, August 17th, 2013

SpaceX keeps coaxing their Grasshopper rockets into longer jumps as they continue to develop their reusable rocket program.

In the latest test, shown in this video, SpaceX’s Grasshopper rocket takes another leap into the history books by making a longer jump away from and safe return to the dead center of its launch pad. Seriously. Watch it!

For those who’d like to know why all the space nerds and getting so excited? Think of the two little rockets attached to the giant fuel tank that the shuttle would piggyback on. Two minutes into the flight they detach, deploy multiple parachutes and land about 150 miles off the coast where a small army of a recovery crew retrieves the boosters, using two specially designed boats. During this whole process motors inside the boosters are used to basically blow-dry the interiors from all the ocean they gulped during their time at sea. Turnaround time is a long process.

Along comes Elon Musk with the idea of a booster that’s like a homing pigeon. It goes up, does its job and then instead of helplessly landing in the middle of the ocean like Bambi on an ice pond, it flies itself back home, landing on its own little pad like a puppy playing frisbee and waiting for the next throw.

The Grasshopper eliminates a lot of space taken up in an old-school booster for chute deployment systems, allows for quicker turnaround time and stops about a hundred people from having to towel off a couple of giant booster rockets.

SpaceX is getting closer to their first take-off/recovery ‘landing’ where they’ll be substituting the ocean for dry land to see how the Grasshopper returns back to the ‘ground’. Once those tests are completed, it won’t be long before the Grasshopper does what Musk hopes it’ll do…

Move us into space faster and more frequently than ever before.


Government Discloses Area 51 is a Real Place – Causes Global Facepalm

Friday, August 16th, 2013

Everyone! Stop EVERYTHING! Right NOW!

Our government, who is always up front on just about every issue you can think of, has just pulled the tablecloth from under our dinners by announcing that some place called Area 51 exists in the Nevada desert!

Beside the eardrum-bursting sound of millions of people facepalming all at once there’s nothing but the sound of crickets and a whole lot of blank stares followed by just as many shrugs as everyone returns to doing whatever the hell they were doing before this announcement hit the wire.

Sure it’s a ridiculous admittance of a place that most people who enjoy weird things hold near and dear to their little, strange hearts. No one’s really sure why it’s happening at this moment. Many of the UFO conspiracy theorists are already beating their chests that they moved the government to take this step because of the big UFO forum that took place in Washington, DC in early spring of this year.

Others are already speculating that the government is prepping us for some kind of announcement that the alleged extraterrestrials often associated with Area 51 are already living among us.

Right now everyone worth their salt in the conspiracy theory and UFO communities are poring over every word in the 407 page document (you can find the links right here) that’s been released and is basically the origin story of the infamously mysterious test site.

Today’s a great day in government transparency!

Who knew there was even a place mysteriously called Area 51?

[The Atlantic Wire]

Sasquatch Sightings in British Columbia!

Sunday, August 11th, 2013

Recently a company called Legend Tracker, that’s created an augmented reality adventure application, put out a call for video submissions to anyone who had footage of what they thought might be everyone’s favorite, but annoyingly elusive, cryptid…Bigfoot.

They’ve done this before…but this time, after sifting through hundreds of submissions, two crazy videos have come out on top.

The first video is from a couple hiking in the area of Mission, British Columbia. While shooting some scenery, they noticed something moving on a hilltop nearby. Is it bigfoot, Rob Zombie on a nature walk or just a feral Kardashian?

That first video is your typical “I spotted Bigfoot!” video…however…the video below, shot by a group of tourists, is probably the weirdest video of an alleged sasquatch because we’re not sure what’s going on in it.

It was sent in as a submission for Bigfoot footage but it looks more like someone’s drunk, hairy, mountain-man uncle who just dropped his moonshine jug or possibly Chaka from the original Land of the Lost. At the end of the video the alleged bigfoot appears to threaten or make a move toward the tourist because everyone starts running around like frightened Muppets. This video was also shot in the Mission, British Columbia area.

[Metro Co UK]

Mysterious Priest Appears at Car Crash – Mysteriously Disappears After Rescue

Sunday, August 11th, 2013

USA Today has posted a story about a mysterious priest who appeared at the site of a car crash where firefighters were having a difficult time removing a girl from the wreckage.

After the priest told firefighters not to worry and that she’d be okay, the girl was freed from her twisted vehicle. Multiple witnesses reported seeing and even speaking with the priest…then they all reported that he seemed to just vanish.

Those involved in the story, including the news crew are continuing to search for the priest so that they can thank him for…uh…being a creepy rubbernecker?

Let’s just hope it’s not Preacher Kane…

[USA Today]