Archive for the ‘Animal Attack’ Category

[Video] And Now… A Zebra Scream “Whoooooa!”

Saturday, December 10th, 2011

The person who uploaded this video swears up and down that the noise made when the zebra opens his mouth is that of the animal and not of he or his friend. I believe him. Because, why not.

Great White Shark Startles North Carolina Tourist

Friday, December 2nd, 2011

25 miles off shore, this big lug (let’s call him Alfie) decides to ominously circle this fishing tourists boat. You know, just for the lulz.

It should also be noted that this video was captured on an iPhone. Which could have lead to the greatest interaction with Siri ever.

Tourist: A Great White Shark is circling my boat, what do I do?

Siri: Let me think… Yeah, you’re screwed.

[KING 5]

They Are Evolving: Octopus Goes From Opaque To Transparent In Seconds

Thursday, November 10th, 2011


We’ve talked at length on the podcast about the intelligence and possible threat presented by Octopi. This will do nothing to bury those very real, justified fears.

Two deep-ocean species of cephalopod, an octopus and a squid, can go from transparent to opaque in the blink of an eye, a new study finds.

This impressive camouflage swap is an adaptation that likely keeps the cephalopods safe from two different types of predators. The first are deep-sea creatures that hunt by looking upward for prey silhouetted against the light filtering down through thousands of feet of water. The second are fish that spotlight prey in “biological” headlights. These fish use bioluminescence, their own body-driven light source, to hunt for food.

They can go invisible now? Maybe it is time to align with the sharks…

[Live Science]

16-Foot Python That Ate A Deer Captured, Killed

Tuesday, November 1st, 2011
16-foot python devours deer in Florida -

Gigantic snakes in the Everglades aren’t all that rare. Massive pythons that make snakes out of full grown deer? A little more cause for concern.

Doe. A meal. A female meal.

Scott Hardin, exotic species coordinator for the Florida Fish and Wildlife Commission, says workers found the snake on Thursday. The reptile was one of the largest ever found in South Florida.

Hardin says the python had recently consumed a 76-pound female deer that had died. He says it was an important capture to help stop the spread of pythons further north.

76-pound doe? Fat kids playing pee wee football don’t weigh 76 pounds!

It’s a good these things are in a far off remote area of the country. Unless you live in a town within 10 miles of the Everglades. Like I do.

Then you’re screwed.



Bear Attempts To Infiltrate Jet Propulsion Lab

Friday, October 28th, 2011

Are aliens controlling the minds of animals in an attempt sabotage state of the art jet technology? Did a rocket scientist accidentally leave a pic-a-nic basket within sniffing distance of the woods? Did a lonely bear simply want to get a look at the latest in high-flying tech?

Whatever the explanation a 200 lb. bear was seen wandering through the Jet Propulsion Laboratory’s Pasadena campus.


Hartebeest Takes Out Biker

Tuesday, October 11th, 2011

Red Hartebeest: 1 – Biker: 0.

That looked pretty deliberate on the Hartebeest’s part. Also looks very painful.


Newspaper Uncovers Decade Long Infestation Of Big Cats In Southern England

Monday, October 10th, 2011

Two counties in Southern England have kept a disturbing secret since 2000. Big cats. Huge, killer beasts have prowled their streets. According to a Freedom of Information Act request, over 205 sightings in a ten year time.

Details of the phone calls range from straightforward details of times, locations and descriptions, to the somewhat strange.

One call recorded in February 2000, from the Roche area of Mid Cornwall, states: “Sighting of large cat-type creature. Caller stated that her son saw a large cat in fields behind their farm in the last five minutes or so.

“Caller stated that it has disappeared again but she wanted to know if they could shoot it, if seen again, or is it protected?” Seven months later, a member of the public from Axminster said: “The beast of Bodmin Moor is in the top of my garden lying down digesting his dinner. I called you 30 minutes ago re. this.”

Although reports have tapered off in recent years, there still remains the mystery of where these cats came from and if they are still lurking in the darkness. Waiting to strike.

[This Is Cornwall]

Piranha Attack Spoils Sexy Brazilian Beach

Tuesday, October 4th, 2011


Brasil! Home of Carnival! Steak houses where they never stop bringing you meat! Sports fans! Random schools of piranhas that swarm beaches with no warning!

Three out of four ain’t bad.

In a scene right out of a horror-movie, complete with scantily clad bathing beauties screaming bloody murder, a swarm of flesh-eating pirahna’s munched on 100 frolicking beachgoers in Brazil this week. The bathers were subsequently treated at a hospital for bites on their heels and toes.

According to River Monsters host Jeremy Wade the attack was most likely caused by swimmers disturbing the resting period of the fish. That would mean the wounds were defensive and not predatory.

What a relief.

[Animal Planet]

Family Of Four Flees Snake-Infested New Home, Once Had To Kill 42 Snakes In One Day

Wednesday, June 15th, 2011

A man’s home is his castle. The sense of satisfaction derived from looking out his bedroom window at night and knowing “these walls protect my pregnant wife and family” can provide the strength to carry him through the day. It is the American dream.


Unless when you look out your window you see the ground move. You’d inch closer to get a better look at why this strange phenomenon is happening if you didn’t already know the answer. It seems the idyllic $180,000 home you purchased in rural Idaho is infested by thousands of snakes. Sliding through the grass, contaminating your well water supply and slithering inside the walls.

Your castle has been besieged by dragons.

Each day, before his pregnant wife and two small boys got out of bed, Sessions said he would do a “morning sweep” through the house to make sure none of the snakes had made it inside. That didn’t always work. One day, he heard his wife scream from the laundry room, where she had almost stepped on a snake. He rushed into the room to find that she’d jumped onto a counter.

“I was terrified she was going to miscarry,” he said…

At the height of the infestation, Sessions said he killed 42 snakes in one day before he decided he couldn’t do it anymore. He had waged war against the snakes and “they won.”

The Sessions family fled the home and now JP Morgan Chase who owns the property has delisted it for future sale.

Snakes, why’d it have to be snakes.


Assault With Weasel

Saturday, June 11th, 2011

And now: taxonomic correction during assault.

Police say a man was carrying a dead weasel when he burst into a Hoquiam apartment and assaulted a man.

The victim asked, “Why are you carrying a weasel?” Police said the attacker said, “It’s not a weasel, it’s a martin,” then punched him in the nose and fled.

The attacker was apparently looking for his girlfriend and had gone to her former boyfriend’s apartment Monday night where the victim was a guest.

KXRO reports he left carcass behind.

[The Seattle Times]

Giant Rats Killing Children, Elderly in South Africa

Monday, June 6th, 2011

Forget about the shapeshifters on the loose – it is being reported that monster rats the size of small dogs are killing and eating children in South Africa. The rats can grow up to three feet long and have inch long teeth.

“The monster rodents are as big as cats are thought to have killed two babies in the townships, according to the The Sun.

Three-year-old Lunathi Dwadwa was killed as she slept in her parent’s shack in a slum outside Cape Town this week.

Another baby girl died in a similar rat attack, on the same day, but this time in the Soweto township near Johannesburg.

Last month, 77-year-old grandmother Nomathemba Joyi died after giant rats chewed off the right side of her face.”

[The Telegraph]

Cops Shoot At Concrete Alligator

Saturday, June 4th, 2011

“Rick Sheridan was working in his garage when he heard gunshots. He went around the back of his house to a pond, where he saw three police officers. The three officers had spotted the gator and were lined up on the bank, shooting at the large reptile.”

No words.

[Fox 4 KC]

Helicopter And Tranquilizer Team Scrambled For Toy Tiger

Tuesday, May 24th, 2011

After somebody spotted what they thought was an escaped tiger through a camera zoom lens near a country club, police in Hampshire scrambled a helicopter equipped with thermal imaging and a tranquilizer take down team from the local zoo. It was only after the downdraft of the helicopter blew the tiger over that everybody realized that it was just a toy. Whoops. Police are treating the incident as lost property and looking for the owner.

Golfers at County Golf Club were also escorted from the course and Saturday’s cricket game between Hampshire Academy and South Wilts was suspended for about half an hour.

Tony Middleton, Hampshire Cricket Academy director, added: “Rumours came round that there was a tiger on the golf course and we just carried on playing until a policeman came over and told us to clear the area.

“I assumed there was [a tiger] with everything that was going on, but we felt quite safe here.”

[BBC via Gizmodo]

Alligator Does Not Respect The Police

Wednesday, May 4th, 2011

Florida is where the magic happens. Also, don’t turn your back on the wildlife.


Boy Skis Into Bear Den, Does Not Die

Wednesday, April 13th, 2011

Ollie Frisk and  four of his friends were skiing in the backcountry at the Härjedalen ski resort, located in northern Sweden, when Ollie unknowingly skied over a bear den which collapsed and sent him sprawling into the bear that was living there. The bear woke up and mauled Ollie, but he survived to tell the tale.

“But Ollie didn’t die. Instead, he says, he quit struggling as he accepted the inevitability of his fate, and when he did so, the bear simply stopped attacking him. A few moments later she wandered out of the lair, where Ollie’s friends made loud noises to scare her away. They then helped Frisk from the den, and back down the hill to safety.”


Feral Chickens Rule The Streets Of New Orleans

Tuesday, April 12th, 2011

Post-Katrina, there is only one gang that rules the once-flooded streets of this suffering city. You can hear their affiliation calls bounce off the battered houses through all hours of the night:

Cluck. Cluck.

Chickens rule this town! Feral ones that don’t scare from humans no more. So far they haven’t become violent. So far.