The Man Who Wasn’t Murdered…Until He Was [Weirdest Murders]

Posted by on June 28th, 2010

Everyday this week…Brett Rounsaville is bringing us the Weirdest Murders ever committed.

It was my favorite American author (well, maybe my second favorite) who once said, “The report of my death was an exaggeration.” Which would be a PERFECT analog to today’s story if just a couple hours after Samuel Clemens uttered one of his most famous phrases…he dropped dead.

In a startling display of topicality, hitherto unseen in this column, just two short days ago José Sergio Vega was murdered in his red Cadillac by an unknown gunman somewhere in Northwest Mexico.

“Pfft. Getting shot is not exactly ‘weird’, Brett.”

I hear what you’re saying, Mr. Disembodied Voice, and, I assure you, I whole-heartedly agree. However, maybe you just need to sit tight and listen to the rest of the story instead of being so damn argumentative and judgmental.

Here’s the weird part: Just a few short hours before “El Shaka” (That’s Vega’s rad musical nom de er…music) was shot dead he was giving an interview expressly to dismiss the rumors that he had been shot dead! (I can neither confirm whether he used the phrase, “Las noticias de mi muerte eran una exageración.”)

Apparently El Shaka is well known around the Mexican Country Music circuit (according to my Mexican Music sources, that’s a real thing) for performing “narcocorridos,” which are songs mostly about the amazing feats of Mexican drug traffickers. Not unlike a 50cent ditty but with less being shot in the face and more running drugs hidden in the headrest of a ’92 Civic across the border (I guess…).

The problem there is that seven such performers have been killed by rival traffickers (miffed by the power ballads extolling their competitors virtues) in the last three years. El Shaka’s lawyer however, seems to think he was being targeted for his sweet ride…

Regardless, kind of makes you want to stop going around telling people you’re not dead, right?

So, how excited are you for a week of weird murders? Got any you think need to make it into the final five? Most importantly, why do drug traffickers have so many songs about them that there’s actually a name for their style of music and I can’t get you guys to write one tiny little theme song about me?!

4 Responses to “The Man Who Wasn’t Murdered…Until He Was [Weirdest Murders]”

  1. Michael Hogan Says:

    I remember seeing a csi episode that revolved around a band like that. Think one of the fans killed the victim of the day.

    Anyway, Round Three Starts Now Rounsaville!!!

    Here is a story of a 14 year old child who plans his own murder using the internet. Basically “John” convinced his friend “Mark” to stab him in a back alley as some part of a British Secret Service initiation.

    The craziest part of this whole thing was that this John guy was only 14 and already trying to kill himself in weird ways. I wonder if it is a UK thing.

  2. Kyle Says:

    That's brilliant…in a very macarbe/weird way of course. Not too sure whether it is indeed a UK thing as I've not had this urge yet. But I'll let Weird Things know if I do!

    What about this? The definition of FAIL. A known murderer, Strahinja Raseta, flees from the law by running off to Serbia. However, he was unable to pay back the friend who gave him the money to flee. So he did the next best thing, ATTEMPT to kill his friend. His plan was simple; place an explosive on his 'mates' car and KABOOM! Problem solved! But weirdly, that didn't go to plan as well as he hoped. When under the car, the muffler was still hot and set the bomb off. KABOOM!

    Pay back.

    Btw, I've only recently stumbled upon this blog and it's just awesome (so's the podcast)!

  3. Brett Rounsaville Says:

    Both great links, guys! The only reason I'd shy away from those is because they're more or less suicides. (Like I should talk. Wait until you see Wednesday's “cheat.” 😉 )

    P.S. Glad you dig Weird Things, Kyle! Justin, et al are doing their best to keep things weird for you!

  4. Weird Things » Blog Archive » The Perfect Murder…On Paper [Weirdest Murders] Says:

    […] 1. El Shaka – The man who wasn’t murdered…until he was. […]