You’ve Seen Jesus Toast, Now See ‘The God Salami’

Posted by on May 20th, 2009

Check out the above video while we lament the state of popular media for ever allowing this to become news. From this incident we can surmise one thing about God: he draws like a five year old given crayons for the very first time. Though to be fair, salami might not be his best medium, toast has been shown to be a much more effective vessels for heavenly images delivered from on high.

We’re also glad to see that Nancy Simoes’ friends put her claim through rigorous analysis before accepting it as a bonafide miracle. As CBS4 reported on Nancy’s Neighbors comments:

“I totally believe her 100 percent,” said one neighbor. “Me too,” said another. For twenty years this South Florida family has fried salami as a breakfast meat. “We ended up all liking it. We just do it. No words come out. No letters. No circles. It’s just fried salami,” said Natasha Batista, who is the daughter of Simoes.

And that’s more than we need to conquer our incredulity. One point of contention, there are entities we know exist that like salami an awful lot. We think if there was anything paranormal going on here, the salami was trying to spell out the word DOG. A possibility apparently lost on Ms. Simoes.

2 Responses to “You’ve Seen Jesus Toast, Now See ‘The God Salami’”

  1. busterggi Says:

    G reat

    O ld

    O nes

  2. busterggi Says:

    G reat

    O ld

    O nes