Zimbabwe Tormented by ‘Countless’ Panty-Stealing Goblins
Wednesday, March 27th, 2013
We don’t know who Chief Njelele is, or who elected him, but by the accounts were hearing, he’s got a real problem in his region of Zimbabwe. We’re talking a Nelson Mandela, Bill Gates and Bono level solve-this-crisis. On of his villagers is being plagued by too many goblins to count according to the Zimia Dispora:
“I asked her how many goblins she had been given and she told me she could not quantify them because they were too many. She hysterically told me that these goblins were haunting her and making her life a living hell,” said Chief Njelele.
Next time you fret about your first world problems, be glad you don’t have to worry about a bunch of thieving goblins stealing women’s underwear and hiding it in your house.
So notorious is Chief Njelele’s area that last year another villager’s goblin allegedly stole panties belonging to 26 women. Another villager later apologised after a tsikamutanda reportedly fingered him as the owner of the thieving goblin. Reporters has it in good authority that the goblin was also found wearing an underwear belonging to a village headman’s wife.
Panties go missing and they find them in some dude’s house who says those damn goblins are to blame.
