The World Has Ended

Posted by Forrest on October 21st, 2011

You might not have noticed, but the world has ended. Harold Camping, the Oakland-based soothsayer who predicted that the world would end in 1994 and in May of 2011 once again foresaw that today would be judgement day. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “But wait, I just bought some Mountain Dew at Safeway and nothing was different. The world can’t have ended.” That’s what you think!

Harold Camping, the Family Radio evangelist who wrongly predicted doomsday back in May, thinks the real end of the world could be today.

In a message on his Web site, Camping declared that today, “at this point, looks like it will be the final end of everything.”

Camping also seems to have learned how to better hedge his bets this time “I really am beginning to think as I restudied these matters that there’s going to be no big display of any kind,” he said in an audio address after suffering a stroke in June. “The end is going to come very, very quietly.”

So there! The world totally ended. You were just too busy playing demonic video games and reading satanic books to notice.

[Washington Post]

  • Penguinempire

    Maybe he is trying to predict his own end.

    A quiet apocalypse that looks just like the every day goings on of a world in which there is no apocalypse going on. Real subtle, Yaweh, real subtle…

  • Anonymous

    Nope. The bible makes the end of the world sound totally badass. The apocolypse doesn’t move around on the tips of its toes and whisper, it plays metal and blows crap up. It’s the final war between heaven and hell. It’s when god blows all of his budget and gives us the big special effects and huge explosions.

    If it’s quiet and has subtitles I totally want my money back. This universe wasn’t worth the price of admission. I wanted a summer blockbuster reality and I got billions of years of boring talk.