In which I add a wholly unnecessary narrative spin to the satisfying, straight-forward conclusion of a classic film.

Today: “Jaws”

After the shark explodes, the movie cuts to an establishing shot of a giant, glass skyscraper with a big sign on it that says, “Science, Inc.” Cut to a small room filled with video monitors where a balding man in a lab coat and a busty brunette in a pantsuit are rewinding footage of Sheriff Brody and Hooper on the Orca. The woman slams a coffee cup down on the table and says, “Ugh. That hick sheriff interfered!” “What should we do?” asks the man. “We have no choice. Initiate a new test sequence,” responds the woman, who then mutters, “the general’s gonna tear me a new one.” The man nods and leaves the room.

The camera follows the bald man down a hallway lined with extensive piping and an array of glass-fronted incubation tubes, each of which contains a Quint. The Quints in each successive grouping of tubes are younger than those in the previous grouping. Finally, the man reaches a series of tubes filled with babies. He walks through a bright red door labeled, “Top Secret.”

Title card: “One week later.” Cut to a small beach located just off a narrow road. A black jeep suddenly turns off the road and drives onto the secluded beach. The tires grind along the sand before slowly crunching to halt. Two men wearing suits and sunglasses step out onto the tide-kissed shore and help a middle-aged Quint out of the vehicle. One of the men consults his watch and then nods to the other. Suddenly, in the background, a Black Hawk helicopter screams across the sky over the ocean and drops a giant shark into the water. Quint turns his head and watches the beast’s enormous, flailing body splash down into the cold, briny deep. Cut to a close up of Quint’s determined stare as he looks out over the Atlantic. There’s the click of a radio channel opening and a man’s voice says, “Test sequence initiated.” Credits roll.

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